Over It


      Last week I saw #1 Brazilian quite a few times, and, our connection didn’t feel as comfortable as it used to. Maybe I’m paranoid, but the way he was acting gave me the impression that he read the post about him, as though he was waiting for me to say something extravagant. I would have, but, I didn’t have the words.

     That vibe is gone, it has fizzled out. I don’t feel the need to physically touch him (ie. be connected through a hug), because I feel a distance, like he’s trying to repel me while being polite and friendly at the same time. It’s not a natural feeling anymore.

     Makes me wonder if I was just imagining things years ago. Either that, or time and our life experiences caused us to drift apart, and neither of us care enough to put a genuine effort to becoming close again.

     And I’m cool with it. I’ve finally had a reality check regarding heartbreaker, and I’m focused on what are the aspects of an unhealthy relationship so that I never get caught in one again. I’m in a learning phase where I gain love in other ways, and discovering other interests that I enjoy thinking about and putting time towards. It’s all good 🙂

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